Spit Swapping

In trying to get the whole Clevelander feel, Jeff and I went to the Cleveland Indians game tonight. I would have loved to go and root for the Indians, but besides the fact that they are one of the worst teams in baseball, they were playing the A's. And I like the the A's. So, rather than cheering at all, I, we actually, ate.

We basically ate all that Progressive Field had to offer (and then stopped for ice cream on the way home). From the grand slam nachos to the waffle fries, everything we had was particularly appetizing on this night.  Well, that is until we stopped shoving our faces and noticed the people sitting in front of us.

 

They look fairly normal, don't they? Sure, they do. I thought so. They were even holding a fairly normal conversation, not that I was eavesdropping, I don't do that kind of thing! They were there with the little miss's parents. That didn't bother me either. That too, seemed fairly normal. I have gone to plenty of games with my parents before. That is definitely nothing to lose an appetite over. 

It all began when the girl, we will call her Josie for some odd reason, took out some candy. Not your normal Reese's, Kit-Kat, or Butterfinger. She took a candy I have never even tried, let alone understood. One of those stupid baby bottle things that you suck on and dip in sugar. The thought of it grosses me out, but Josie has brought it to a whole new level!

Now what Josie did with that was lick the sh*# out of it. Got it all sticky and covered in saliva. Ugh. Then, she turned to her sunglass toting boyfriend, Matt we will call him, and asked him if he would like some. With that he proceeded to lick the sh*# out of it as well. Along with the sugar it was dipped in, he also got a mouth full of Josie's spit. I guess, in a way, the two of them are probably swapping spit anyways, so it shouldn't be that big of a deal. I wasn't too keen on the idea, but I could live with it. 

And live with it, I did! Until Josie offered the little blue sugar covered candy sucker to her parents, who both seemed very intrigued to try it. So Momma Josie and Papa Josie then proceed to lick the sh*# out of the thing. Mama Josie washed her globs of spit down with a beer. Papa Josie, through his headphones, said, "thank you Josie, may I have another?" 

 

After this episode of spit swapping I was revolted. I was sure I could have thrown up on the spot. But I didn't. Maybe that is why Jeff and I decided to leave after the third inning. Or maybe it was boredom from the league's worst Indians. You be the judge. Either way, my stomach was not appreciating it. 

Surprisingly, that feeling of sickness went away as we pulled into the Cold Stone Creamery parking lot on the way home from the game. Weird how my stomach works!